Monday, March 24, 2008

Tooth or Consequences


And to add to the things that I am not domestically or maternally good at...
being the Tooth Fairy.

The middle child once completely gave up after a week of leaving her tooth under her pillow with no results. I think she just tossed it away in disgust.

I don't know what is wrong with me - I just cannot seem to remember. And I feel so terrible the following morning, you'd think that would spur me on, but...no. I usually don't even notice until about the third day when the poor child comes dragging down the stairs saying, "The Tooth Fairy forgot, AGAIN!"

So we developed a sort of a system where on each night that the TF doesn't show up, the amount of money due the toothless recipient is doubled.
You can make big bucks losing teeth at our house.

Several days after losing a molar, the boy twin moaned to me about how he was checking every morning and I winced. The husband spoke to me about "handling it", and miraculously I remembered, but only had one dollar in change on hand. I wrote a note, in my best left hand writing, instructing him to check under his pillow the following night for the rest of the cash.

I looked at the note and the erratic, suspicious handwriting.
It lacked something.
So I added:
"Sorry for the delay, but I have been in prison."

Perfect.

9 comments:

First UMC said...

HA!!!! Love the P.S.

I don't know who thought up the tooth fairy. Probably one of those perfect Moms that never forgets to send the eggs in with her kid and gets a phone call that they are NOW decorating eggs and he is the only one without his eggs.

Probably.

cjs said...

I am really laughing.

and feeling deeply related to you.

because that is me. every single thing you just wrote.

I so love you.

cjs said...

ok, the prison thing is going to keep me laughing all night.

I've said things like "maybe she couldn't find it. maybe you're supposed to put it inSIDE your pillowcase, not underneath it. maybe lots of kids are losing teeth right now and she's just really busy. maybe she's sick."

prison...I am laughing.

Molly said...

Hahaha, that is awesome about the TF being in prison!

Joann said...

Prison? ha! why couldn't I have thought of that. Our joke is that the tooth fairy is a union worker.

Kulio said...

haha - okay I'm so glad nobody thought that was tooo weird. You should have seen his eyes when he read the note. And he kept showing the note around, with big eyes....Yeah I think we've gone through all the excuses that we could think of - so this time, no explanation necessary, just...prison.

Kulio said...

okay and I love love reading comments...

Michelle said...

You're a BRILLIANT shining Mom aren't you. I hope that this becomes one of many family held folk tales for all of time.
Shine on!

Lisa Yik the Chick said...

Oh, that's me! Thank goodness adult teeth and disbelief happen, cuz I was running out of excuses too. Never came up with the prison one, but I think her dog died once!